Milestones
Connect with Yourself
Our busy lives and obligations to others can result in very little time to stop and listen to ourselves. This can leave us feeling out of touch with how we feel, what we need, what we believe, or even who we are.
When you take time to be alone, one of the most important things you gain is connection with yourself. This connection helps you enjoy your own company, stay centered when times are tough, and accept yourself for who you are.
You can foster that connection with these three skills:
- Enjoy Solitary Activities
- Feel and Regulate Your Emotions
- Be Introspective
Protect Your Time
We experience the benefits of solitude when we apply our time, energy, and commitment to it. Without these structures in place, our time in solitude is endangered.
For example, we may long to get away by ourselves, but if we can’t find space to be alone… or we feel too guilty to take any time for ourselves… or we don’t know what to do with ourselves when we finally find ourselves alone, then we won’t be able to reap any of the benefits of solitude.
Embracing solitude involves figuring out how to protect our alone time. It calls on us to apply these three skills:
- Make Time To Be Alone
- Be Mindful of Your Time in Solitude
- Validate Your Need to Be Alone
Find A Balance
It’s often been said that humans are social creatures. Our social relationships make us who we are – from giving us language and creating culture to experiencing love and forming our identities.
And… wanting to be alone is also a natural human desire. Solitude helps us self-regulate when we feel overwhelmed or overstimulated. It provides time, space, and privacy for us to restore our energy, be creative, concentrate deeply… or just be.
Moving between solitude and the social world is a balancing act.
Each of us has a different ratio of how much of our time we would rather spend alone or with others, but that ratio can change from day to day. It’s important to listen to your own signals for when you need to be alone, and when you need the company of others.
Two skills support you in finding a balance:
- Listen to Your Solitude Signals
- Know When to Exit Solitude
